Thursday, August 6, 2009

4 Days Over...

Just by chance, one of the blogs I read regularly (Dooce) had something to say on being an overdue pregnant woman that made me laugh. I don't feel quite as bad as what's written but I'm definitely convinced that I'm just destined to be pregnant forever and that there's not REALLY a baby in there.


I had to physically push all these negative thoughts out of my brain because people were sending me stories about women who had gone, like, 18 days past their due date. 18! OH MY GOD! Can you even believe that? Men, you don't understand this, but that number is just incomprehensible. Because once you go A SINGLE DAY past your due date you are suddenly unable to count past one. What comes after that number? Nothing, right? Because I can't go another day. I cannot walk, and my face is retaining so much water that I cannot lift it off this pillow, it is so heavy. Wait, two? There's a number two? TWO?! THEY NEVER TAUGHT ME THAT IN KINDERGARTEN, THOSE BITCHES!

And suddenly you think, that's it, I'm going to be pregnant forever. Ask any woman who has ever been pregnant and they will tell you that they have had that thought. And then followed that thought with a giant bowl of chocolate ice cream. And then some uncontrollable flatulence.

3 comments:

die Frau said...

Oh, dear.

Soon! It will happen so soon!

die Frau said...

BTW, I was a week late. So was my friend H's baby. I bet it will happen TODAY!

at jaynes ave said...

It's great to see you have a sense of humor about the whole thing! Sophia was 8 days overdue, and I learned that it is common for one's first pregnancy to be overdue. It's good practice for the birth, this waiting. There's a lesson here: that you, my dearest Lily, don't really have much of a say. I know, it hurts to hear it. But, this process is not about our minds and our expectations and as soon as those two things are out of the way, the easier it will be. Nature, our bodies know EXACTLY what to do, it is really so amazing. And, if it makes you feel any better, in hind-sight there are some days when I think, "Geez, I would give my left arm if Sophie had just waited 2 1/2 years to come out!" Hopefully this doesn't sound crazy, but reassuring. Remember that so much of parenting is sitting back and watching the beauty and grace of life unfold in front of you. Dig deep down and find the strength within yourself to sit back, relax (because that may not be so easy to do come a few more days), and TRUST in the process, in yourself, and in your baby-girl. Now, deeply inhale, slowly exhale, and fart away... xoxox!
P.S. we've got the "baby come out" dance going on here. Hopefully it helps!

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