Thursday, October 6, 2011

Recipe for Violence

  • 1 Pregnant Lady
  • 1 Spare Bedroom filled with mold - preferably for about a month, unaddressed by landlord
  • 1 Severe mold allergy
  • 1 Toddler with a suspected mold allergy
  • 1 Broken plumbing system, to include the following non-functional items: shower, all sinks, dishwasher, washing machine
  • 1 Thong - too small because of aforementioned pregnancy and therefore very violence inducing (included in the recipe only because of the broken plumbing and lack of clean laundry)

Before starting, take Pregnant Lady and make her hunch her fat ass with the bad spine over the tub to brush her teeth and wash her hands.

Combine all ingredients into a house in upstate NY. Stir. Watch for explosion.

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